My 'last' summer

I survived! First year of medical school - check! It sure does feel good to be on the other side of this year and to be headed into summer. Looking back on it now, the year seems to have breezed by. There is no denying that this year was a bit of a roller coaster and a huge challenge in a multitude of ways, but I am happy to have been through it all. I have emerged largely unscathed and a bit more centered, empowered, and ready for the next phase. The first quarter was all about figuring out Stanford culture and what it means to succeed academically in a very challenging, high-expectation environment. Winter quarter involved juggling numerous classes and exploring whether it is even possible to acquire some academic rhythm amidst a diverse and dense curriculum. I feel like a found my stride in spring quarter. I now have a better understanding of how I need to study to both do well and absorb the information I really need to know. I am able to devote time to the extracurriculars I really enjoy and spend some time with my friends. It is true, medical school is hard on relationships, friends, family, and partners, and I know that it will continue to be hard, if not harder. I have felt that deeply this year and I know all of my classmates have struggled with that at one time or another. Yet, I think I am finding a better way of splitting my time between the medical world and everything else. I know, without a doubt, that I am someone for whom living completely within the medical world would be dissatisfying. I need a life outside of it and I am trying to cultivate good habits, routines, etc. that will help me hold onto all that feeds me outside of the medical profession. Staying true to my values now and into the future will prove to be incredibly important. At Stanford, it is particularly easy to be swept up by the high expectations, the opportunities, the connections, etc. and forget that one has to be quite deliberate about one's path, otherwise the momentum of it all will take over. Spring quarter wrapped up nicely. The last few weeks were full of events honoring student advisors/mentors and faculty, panel discussions led by Stanford medical graduates about to transition to residency, and lots of studying for finals. I had four exams in the last week of school – the last cardiovascular block exam, a practical clinical skills exam, a written exam on differential diagnosis, clinical exam findings, and diagnostics, and then our integrated block exam (respiratory system plus the cardiovascular system). The practical exam was the highlight for me. It consisted of a 25-minute, problem-focused visit where we were supposed to exercise our clinical reasoning skills. Each of us had a patient presenting with uncontrolled high blood pressure and worsening chest pain and our task was to interview them with our differential diagnosis guiding the questions we chose. I love the challenge of having to both interact with the patient and efficiently problem-solve what brought them there. To us first-year med students, a 25-minute visit seems soooo short, so I definitely was pressed for time, but it went very well. I think I asked good questions and I still had time for a lung and heart exam (albeit quite brief). 9 months into medical school, I certainly feel that my interviewing skills have vastly improved and I am feeling much more comfortable with the physical exam. I look forward to next year, as we get to further hone those skills, learn more specific physical exam components, and see more 'real' patients. I will have the added bonus of more immersion with clinical skills material as a TA for the clinical skills and ethics curriculum for first-years. The day of my last final, I celebrated the end of first-year by getting a pedicure with my classmates Liana, Lindsey, and Cassie, then lounged poolside with Alex and Liana until we met up with the rest of my class in downtown Palo Alto. It was a wonderful we to celebrate having made it all this way. The next day, I flew to Seattle for 10 days with family and friends. I spent a few days in Seattle and most of my time on Whidbey. I caught up with friends from high school, college, and lots of family. Whether it was the time spent in the vegetable garden with my mom, playing in the yard with Weston, or catching up with dear friends over coffee, I loved it all! The highlights: dinner at my favorite restaurant on Whidbey (Gordon's), had my first taste of filet mignon and 3 hours of great conversation with my parents a day in the city with my best friend from high school, Ann – spin class, lunch at the Pink Door, tour of Pike Place, dinner at her beautiful home, and Mad Men = perfect! excursion to Port Townsend with my parents, complete with Thai food, ice cream, bookstores, and a movie at the Rose Theatre! family potluck to celebrate my cousin's newly attained American citizenship – aunts, uncles, cousins galore! I returned to the bay area on June 25th for a week of research and catching up with friends. After that, Alex and I jetted to North Carolina on July 2nd for 5 days with his mom's family in the Outer Banks. It was really fun to take part in such a big family reunion. Alex's mom has three sisters – one from Virginia, one from Colorado, and one from Texas. They rented a big house right on the beach and we all got to catch up, sunbathe, swim in the ocean, swim in the pool, eat good food, etc. I felt very welcome and it was some of the most relaxing time I have had this summer. It certainly was hot over there (over 100 most days and humid), but I thoroughly enjoyed it and it was hard to leave. One of the more unique moments I had when I was there was waking up for an early morning ocean swim and paddleboard experience with Alex and having ~8 dolphins swim right past me as I sat quietly on my board. They were so close, I felt like I could reach out and touch them! Amazing! Now, I am back in the bay area for most of the remainder of my summer. My days are spent either working on research, attending meetings, coordinating the outdoor orientation for the incoming medical students, having bbqs with friends, and searching for housing for the coming year. I have to move within the next month, so I am madly trying to find a place closer to campus to call home. Hopefully, I will find something really soon so that I can move slowly, rather than frantically. The housing market is nuts in this area, both in terms of price and in terms of competition, so I will be happy to be over this hurdle. Alex and I went to Salinas, CA yesterday to check out the land of John Steinbeck. We went to the National Steinbeck Center and I reminisced about how much I loved reading East of Eden while we were traveling in Mexico and Guatemala last summer. We explored Salinas a little (ate some humongous fresh blackberries and picked up some okra to make at home – my knew culinary specialty), drove up to Castroville to sample some deep fried giant artichoke hearts, then stopped in Santa Cruz from some happy hour margaritas on the wharf. So much fun! Now, I plan to be deliberate about how I approach my summer. I want to feel like I have more momentum with my research, which means devoting more time to it and focusing a bit more. I want to explore the outdoors – more hiking, camping, etc. Alex will be moving back to the northwest at the end of August to start a year of travel, so we want to soak up every ounce of summer fun we can. I think we are doing pretty well so far! Another goal for summer – more blog posts and reflections, so stay tuned. I fell of the blog-wagon a bit, but I am back and hope to reconnect with this as part of my routine. Happy Sunday to all my family and friends! Stay tuned! :-)